Next stage of therapy
I want to run again. I want to quit and hide. The urge is so unbelievably strong. I did quit something, couples counseling. I decided I needed to focus on my individual counseling for a while, and I...
View ArticleCPT Trauma Impact Statement:Why I think this trauma occurred
My homework this week is to write a more in depth impact statement. I did this already when I started CPT many months ago, but since it was a group, we were asked to be vague and not include any...
View ArticleMemory Gaps, What is my brain hiding from me?
I am fully aware that many parts of my life are unknown to me. This is an odd feeling to say the least. Knowing what happened in my other memories, I am sure my brain has done me a great favor in...
View ArticleTimeline
Last week’s homework for therapy was to create a timeline of my entire life including anything major, stressful, traumatic, or highly memorable. Umm yeah this was not fun. I went back through forty...
View ArticleDisorganized Thoughts
One of the most troubling problems I face daily is the jumbled swirl of disorganized thoughts in my sorry excuse for a brain. I know, be nice to myself. But I have to use my back button more then I...
View ArticleParanoia, mistrust, or I know better
Paranoia sounds like a clinical disorder and it is a label given to many with PTSD and other anxiety embedded illnesses. I wanted to write yesterday about the distinction between paranoia and mistrust....
View ArticleUnbalanced Thoughts
Neurotypicals will never understand the complicated thought process someone like me must endure. My brain is different (understatement) so how I perceive and react to the world is different. I...
View ArticleGet Motivated. Right Now.
How do you reach that motivational state of mind? Motivation is tricky and not well understood. It is not linear or one sided. No motivation is complex and loopy and involves multiple factors, some...
View ArticleIt doesn’t matter – Yes it does!
What you do matters. What you want matters. How you feel matters. I’m ready to start my list and I figured out why it is so difficult. Remember those stuck points from cognitive processing therapy?...
View ArticleTrauma is in the eye of the beholder
What do people really think about you? What are you showing them? Well what they think depends on how they frame it in their minds anyway. So much subjectivity, so much interpretation and assumption....
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